Sunday, 29 November 2015

The harsher nature of the non theatrical sadist.

Saturday I went to a short seminary in basic shibari(1) techniques - the base knot, the takate-kote box-tie, pelvic harness and a semi suspension.

A basic takate-kote.
The skewers are a dabotzian addendum, you don't use them IRL

It has been extremely nice, and fun.

Being the kind of semi-reclusive oddball that I am, I didn't manage to get a hand on a model but, luckily, there was one fine woman that wants very much to be  tightly bound and had no rigger at hand, so we got paired. 

To be honest, the fact that she is going to move out of the area soon, to find her forever domme (... yes, domme (2) )  was a bit of an help, because... I really am one horny dog.

In more than a couple of moments, a very unprofessional and a bit unethical hard-on went in the way of the ropes (3).

Fear not, my reader... I managed to maintain a shade of decency.

However, this was not my main mistake during the event.

My partner - blessed be her heart - looked pretty serious most of the time.

Me being me, I read that as being bored, which is quite unusual - the mean time between an half mile and a full laugh, around me, is measurable in minutes.

I am, after all, an intelligent human being affected by a sometimes sulphurous sense of humour and a lingering fear of being a bother to the world. I make people laugh, because so I know that they are at ease with me around - I do not take it as a given.

She, instead, went on in serious mode for what are - for me - unnerving stretches of time.

In the end, I asked her, and she said that she was psyching herself in the role of the victim.

Unfortunately, my ideal victim is giggling, outside of the moments of rough play, so it kind of messed me up a bit.

Meanwhile, the instructor (Sr. Interior) explained that, in reality, shibari is more about "service and satisfaction", and humiliation, than anything else. I didn't really understand, right then, so I had to sleep over it.

When I refuse to go along and play the part of the terrible kidnapper, in a way I am failing my part of the show. The shibari action is also a bit of theatrics that allows the rigged person to let her ego go, for a while. The rigger has to take the responsibility of strip that  ego from the model to fully fill his role, and I really am not much into this part. 

Maybe, because I can't seem to be able to shake the grip of my bothersome super-ego on almost everything I do, and I am somewhat envious of someone that manages to do it? 

Any way, I realize my mistake, now. 

I hope I'll do better next time. 

1) Shibari, or Kinbaku, is a form of bondage play with roots in the Japanese tradition.

2) Domme, or Dominatrix: A female dominant person, to not be confused with dom, which is nowadays almost always referred only to men .

3)Next time, I shall cut the caffeine the day before - let's hope that having a more sedate limbic system will help.

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